Dealing with picky eater is honestly the longest war I’ve ever fought, and I’m a 38-year-old dad in suburban Ohio who once thought parenting would be chill. Like, seriously — last Tuesday I almost cried into a bowl of cold spaghetti because my six-year-old declared it “too saucy.” Too saucy. I’m over here trying not to lose my entire mind while the dog waits under the table like a vulture.
I’ve screamed. I’ve begged. I’ve hidden pureed spinach in brownies (he found it, gagged dramatically, and now won’t touch brownies — my own childhood favorite). I’ve done the whole “you sit there until you try one bite” thing and ended up throwing out stone-cold chicken nuggets at midnight while he slept victorious in bed. Real talk: dealing with picky eater has exposed every weak spot in my personality. I’m impatient, I’m a people-pleaser, and apparently I have zero chill when someone rejects food I spent an hour cooking.
The Mistakes I’m Not Proud Of When Dealing with Picky Eater
Oh let me count the ways I screwed this up.
- Became a short-order cook every damn night (nuggets for him, actual dinner for the rest of us — guess who felt like a servant?)
- The “airplane spoon” complete with engine noises — worked exactly twice, then he called it “cringy” at age four. FOUR.
- Bribing with ice cream. Works short-term, then they get wise real quick and start negotiating like tiny lawyers.
- Saying “there are starving kids in the world” — instant guilt trip fail, plus he just shrugged and said “send them my broccoli then.” Touché, kid.
The Night It Almost Broke Me (True Story)
Thanksgiving 2024. My mom made her famous green bean casserole. Kid takes one look, screams “IT HAS GREEN DOTS” and crawls under the table. Entire family staring at me. I’m sweating through my ugly Christmas sweater, whispering threats about Santa through clenched teeth while simultaneously trying to look like a competent parent. Ended up eating his portion myself at 1 a.m. while hate-watching Bluey and questioning every life choice that led me here.
What Actually (Finally) Started Working for Dealing with Picky Eater
After years of failure, here’s the stuff that’s given me actual wins lately. Zero judgment if you’re still in the trenches — I’m only like 15% less insane now.
- Let him “cook” with me — even if it’s just dumping pre-shredded cheese on plain pasta. Ownership is magic.
- Two-bite rule instead of clean-plate nonsense. He tries two bites, he’s done. No drama, no power struggle. (Took me way too long to try this — thank you random Reddit thread at 3 a.m.)
- I stopped making food a battleground. Huge. If he’s hungry later, same dinner gets reheated. No snacks, no negotiation. Took three miserable nights, but now he eats most of his food. Most.
- Deconstructed meals — put everything separate on the plate. Chicken strip, bare pasta, raw carrot sticks, whatever. He mixes what he wants. Revolutionary for my specific picky eater.
- I started eating the damn vegetables myself with exaggerated “mmmm” noises. Sometimes he copies. Sometimes he calls me weird. I’ll take the win.
Here, have some actual expert backup so I don’t sound completely unhinged:
- American Academy of Pediatrics on picky eaters → https://www.healthychildren.org/English/ages-stages/toddler/nutrition/Pages/Picky-Eaters.aspx
- Mayo Clinic’s take (they’re kinder than me) → https://www.mayoclinic.org/healthy-lifestyle/childrens-health/in-depth/childrens-health/art-20044948
- KidsHealth/Nemours (saved my sanity multiple times) → https://kidshealth.org/en/parents/picky-eater.html
